13 Ways to criticize PoPville, ranked WalterOctober 22, 2015 PoPville has established itself as Washington’s leading platform for anonymous white property owners to embarrass themselves, but it's... 12 Comments
State-shaped cutting boards, ranked by utility WalterSeptember 1, 2015 1. Colorado 2. Wyoming 3. North Dakota 4. Kansas ... 2 Comments
A guide to being uncool at the Raven xavier_from_new_yorkJune 1, 2016 The Raven in Mount Pleasant is one of Washington’s oldest and most loved bars, famed for its cheap beer, uncomfortable booths,... 5 Comments
If the dudes in the National Gallery were on Tinder BrioSeptember 14, 2015 JT, 28, 3 miles away Consultant. Crossfit. Lists Greek letters. LEFT Carl, 33, 4 miles away Says he's a big Woody Allen fan;... 4 Comments
DC’s Neighborhood Namesakes, Ranked WalterDecember 7, 2015 Washingtonians care a lot about neighborhood names. Just look at the recent backlash over the coining of “North End Shaw,” or listen to... 6 Comments
DC’s top thrive bars xavier_from_new_yorkSeptember 8, 2015 Thrive Bar (thrīv bär) Noun. A popular, profitable bar patronized largely by upwardly mobile white millennials with disposable income who... 24 Comments
DC’s college kids, ranked xavier_from_new_yorkFebruary 16, 2016 The only people in Washington worse than the millennials who move here in their twenties for jobs are the ones who move here in their teens... 29 Comments
DC’s 40 most ubiquitous street stickers xavier_from_new_yorkDecember 14, 2015 A city with a thriving street sticker scene, Washington is one big public canvass with thousands of artists vying for your eyeballs and... 31 Comments
Incredible! These birds have young woman tattoos BrioJune 14, 2016 How can you tell when a bird is a unique free spirit? When it has tattoos of young women of course! You've gotta check out these incredible... 2 Comments
I’m a cherry blossom tourist tourist WalterMarch 30, 2016 Aren’t the cherry blossom tourists just beautiful this time of year? The cherry blossoms are okay too, but that’s not really my thing.... 2 Comments
Lost causes, ranked by how cool it is to work in them in Washington xavier_from_new_yorkAugust 10, 2015 1. The Environment Don’t be one of those saps holding a clipboard, asking passersby if they have a minute for the environment. They... 1 Comment
Jumbo Slice is so gross not even birds and squirrels will eat it WalterApril 27, 2016 It seemed like a foolproof plan for a listicle. I walked to Adams Morgan last week and purchased one cheese Jumbo Slice from each of... 10 Comments
DC’s terrible team names, ranked xavier_from_new_yorkMarch 1, 2016 Washington has by far the worst collection of college and pro sports team names in the country, and not just because one of them is a... 1 Comment
DC’s #1 rankings, ranked BrioFebruary 25, 2016 Washington let out a collective scoff yesterday when we heard that financial analytics firm SmartAsset had named Metro the #1 public... 0 Comments
DC’s 40 most ubiquitous street stickers xavier_from_new_yorkDecember 14, 2015 A city with a thriving street sticker scene, Washington is one big public canvass with thousands of artists vying for your eyeballs and... 31 Comments
People in DC Asking You For Money, Ranked xavier_from_new_yorkDecember 9, 2015 9 Political candidates and organizations In the post-Citizens United world, it’s pretty silly to throw your money in the maw of a... 0 Comments
DC’s Neighborhood Namesakes, Ranked WalterDecember 7, 2015 Washingtonians care a lot about neighborhood names. Just look at the recent backlash over the coining of “North End Shaw,” or listen to... 6 Comments
13 Ways to criticize PoPville, ranked WalterOctober 22, 2015 PoPville has established itself as Washington’s leading platform for anonymous white property owners to embarrass themselves, but it's... 12 Comments
Every punny business name in DC, ranked BrioOctober 1, 2015 Wordplayers, rejoice! Atlas Obscura has done the lord's work and crowdsourced a list and map of punny business names across America. As... 5 Comments
Lost causes, ranked by how cool it is to work in them in Washington xavier_from_new_yorkAugust 10, 2015 1. The Environment Don’t be one of those saps holding a clipboard, asking passersby if they have a minute for the environment. They... 1 Comment
DC’s 61 non-Smithsonian museums, ranked BrioJuly 3, 2015 1 United States Holocaust Memorial Museum 2 National Gallery of Art 3 Dumbarton Oaks Research Library and Collection 4... 0 Comments
Every Washington bus line, ranked BrioApril 15, 2015 It's crucial that we rank these. 135 E6 Friendship Heights-Knollwood 134 D2 Glover Park-DuPont Circle 133 81... 1 Comment
A guide to being uncool at the Raven xavier_from_new_yorkJune 1, 2016 The Raven in Mount Pleasant is one of Washington’s oldest and most loved bars, famed for its cheap beer, uncomfortable booths,... 5 Comments
Jumbo Slice is so gross not even birds and squirrels will eat it WalterApril 27, 2016 It seemed like a foolproof plan for a listicle. I walked to Adams Morgan last week and purchased one cheese Jumbo Slice from each of... 10 Comments
10 food and drink trends to endure in 2016 BrioJanuary 6, 2016 2015 was a big year for food and drink in the District. It was the year of family-style dishes, vegetable-centric menus, Filipino food, and... 1 Comment
Fig & Olive President Apologizes for Journalism Outbreak BrioDecember 21, 2015 Nearly four months after hundreds of patrons of the upscale Mediterranean restaurant were infected by salmonella, Fig & Olive president... 0 Comments
“Caviar fusion lounge” named after criminal coming to K Street WalterOctober 28, 2015 In what I have confirmed is not a piece of exquisite satire by Washington City Paper’s Jessica Sidman, DC’s first “caviar fusion... 0 Comments
Washington’s standing water, ranked by potability WalterOctober 6, 2015 I love water. I've been drinking it as long as I can remember, and at this point, I can't imagine living without it. As a devoted... 4 Comments
DC’s top thrive bars xavier_from_new_yorkSeptember 8, 2015 Thrive Bar (thrīv bär) Noun. A popular, profitable bar patronized largely by upwardly mobile white millennials with disposable income who... 24 Comments
An interview with the man behind Washington’s newest pupuseria xavier_from_new_yorkJuly 25, 2015 A new locally-owned pupuseria called By the Pipil, For the People is slated to open on Mt. Pleasant St. NW between Kilbourne and Kenyon... 2 Comments
DC’s major grocery stores, ranked WalterApril 6, 2015 37 Dean and Deluca, 3276 M Street NW The single most expensive grocery store in Washington is also the worst. A... 1 Comment
Civil Libertarians denounce DC’s Eagle Cam BrioMarch 25, 2016 Calling it a highly symbolic example of the surveillance state run amok, civil libertarians have denounced Washington’s popular Eagle... 0 Comments
A look inside the proposed McMillan development BrioMarch 14, 2016 The McMillan Sand Filtration Site in northern LeBloomingdroit has stood empty for years, leaving the city's sand woefully unfiltered.... 4 Comments
Lame: DC Council is targeting street artists xavier_from_new_yorkJanuary 20, 2016 You’d better watch your back Gare Voyer, because the DC Council is gunning for you and every other Washington street artist. Yesterday,... 7 Comments
Local liberal shocked to find self outraged Walmart isn’t building more stores in DC WalterJanuary 18, 2016 After hearing Friday’s news that Walmart will renege on its deal with the city and forgo two pledged stores in poor, black areas of Ward... 1 Comment
Activist campaigns to make ‘Make DC Weird’ weird xavier_from_new_yorkDecember 18, 2015 You’ve heard all the stereotypes about Make DC Weird. They’re misguided, they’re uninspired, they hold parades where ten people show... 0 Comments
Furor over Arabic numerals closes Virginia schools xavier_from_new_yorkDecember 18, 2015 RICHMOND—Amid a national wave of anti-Islamic sentiment, school districts across Virginia have closed this morning in response to a... 0 Comments
DDOT: Streetcar to open by the end of the day xavier_from_new_yorkOctober 20, 2015 On Sunday, Washington’s top transportation official, Leif Dormsjo, told the Post that the oft-delayed and much-maligned D.C. Streetcar... 2 Comments
Should Christians be allowed to pray in bike lanes? xavier_from_new_yorkSeptember 30, 2015 Today the Post asked whether people should jog in DC’s bike lanes. The very notion sparked outrage and derision from DC’s cycling... 1 Comment
Local man works Metro outrage into every conversation xavier_from_new_yorkSeptember 29, 2015 Friendship Heights resident Kevin Haines works his disgust with the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority and the Metrorail system... 0 Comments
“The very important people of Washington are short on time and easily bored” WalterAugust 19, 2015 Yesterday, the Post published a necessary piece about how ritzy Washington parties are changing in the digital age. Not yet being of the... 1 Comment
Study: Alcohol 114 times deadlier than weed, but don’t expect DC to cut the lame pot jokes WalterFebruary 23, 2015 For all the enthusiasm in DC for craft cocktails and microbrews, it turns out you may be better off shooting up some craft heroin than... 0 Comments
115 punny Thai restaurants that should exist BrioOctober 11, 2015 Thai food is delicious, but the best part is the restaurant names it inspires; no other cuisine lends itself so well to wordplay. Two... 0 Comments
Boyfriendship heights, or how he learned to stop bitching and love TJ Maxx BrioOctober 8, 2015 But baaaabe! We’ve been up here all day, cries Boyfriend with dismay. But his protest doesn’t faze her, for she needs a new... 0 Comments
Every punny business name in DC, ranked BrioOctober 1, 2015 Wordplayers, rejoice! Atlas Obscura has done the lord's work and crowdsourced a list and map of punny business names across America. As... 5 Comments
Adverbs have quickly become the hottest baby names xavier_from_new_yorkAugust 28, 2015 Today the Social Security Administration released data showing the most popular American baby names of 2014. Emma and Noah were first on... 0 Comments
Alone on U Street BrioAugust 20, 2015 I just moved here, I’m new and I need to make friends, so I went out on U but found only dead ends. I was apprehensive, going out... 5 Comments
House intern arrested with gun, in verse BrioJune 1, 2015 Congressional intern arrested with unloaded gun in House building Oh golly! Oh gosh! You're not in Kansas anymore, Josh. It's... 2 Comments
John Kerry’s bike accident, in verse BrioMay 31, 2015 Kerry hurt in bike accident; rest of Europe visit cancelled Secretary Kerry is a dreamer pretending to be Lance when he falls and... 1 Comment
Vera Bradley, in verse BrioMarch 14, 2015 I saw my friend had A new bag on her shoulder And it looked really bad, So this is what I told her: Green, pink, and choral, Those... 4 Comments
Two cringeworthy hours at the Districtland premier WalterMarch 7, 2016 Districtland, a would-be (but hopefully won’t-be) series about five millennials living in a group house in Columbia Heights, is bad, as... 7 Comments
Stuck in a Bland DC: a review of Puff Pieces’ excellent new album PhilApril 21, 2016 When alien archaeologists arrive on whatever’s left of Earth to try and figure out what the hell happened, they’ll be lucky to find a... 0 Comments
Minnesotans announce plans to downplay snow, insult locals WalterJanuary 21, 2016 Wearing light jackets without hats or gloves, the District's Minnesota natives held an outdoor press conference this morning to announce... 113 Comments
Vegan propaganda spotted on snowy cars across DC BrioJanuary 23, 2016 It seems a vegan conspiracy may be afoot in the streets of Washington amid one of the biggest blizzards in city history. Apparently taking... 5 Comments
Rumsfeld Walks Among Us WalterAugust 9, 2015 My morning at work started with this gchat with my buddy Max: Max: guess who I saw on K street this morning. i’ll give you a hint:... 2 Comments
Remember Scalia as a bigot BrioFebruary 23, 2016 The late Antonin Scalia was a brazen bigot who did everything in his considerable power to curtail oppressed peoples’ pursuits of... 2 Comments
5 better things to name after Ronald Reagan than DCA WalterSeptember 7, 2015 Last week President Obama renamed our nation’s highest peak, Alaska’s Mt. McKinley, to its original, Indian moniker of Denali. This was... 3 Comments
3.6 hours in DuPont Circle WalterMay 1, 2015 The name DuPont Circle, like Logan and anachronistic Truxton, is most often used as a synecdoche, a moniker for the entire neighborhood... 0 Comments
3.6 hours in Upper Northwest Washington WalterMay 1, 2015 If someone asks you where Wisconsin and Nebraska meet, don’t say Iowa! No, they’re talking about Tenleytown. Replete with loitering... 1 Comment
Ask a DC-based Talking Heads lyrics bot BrioMarch 16, 2015 We've enlisted a Talking Heads lyrics generator to answer your burning questions about live and love in Washington. Dear... 1 Comment
Bowser’s Bargains: Everything in DC must go! WalterSeptember 28, 2015 Attention buyers and real estate developers: NOW is your chance to own a slice of beautiful Washington, D.C. Mayor and motivated seller... 0 Comments
